“Part of being sane is being a little bit crazy” Janet Long
Have you ever felt like you were going crazy? I mean like that “you need a V8” crazy? Y’all remember that commercial, the one where everyone is walking sideways until they get a V8 and they straighten up? Like that’s not crazy crazy…it’s just an “ummm something’s slightly off” type of crazy. Perhaps you cry in the morning, laugh by noon, on the ledge by 3, and having the best time of your life by 8. You feel me? Like THAT type of crazy…where things are just array…you know just a wee bit off. Yeah. So that’s how I’ve been feeling these days. Uh huh, your girl is looking uber-unstable. But what are you to do? I like to say it’s what gives me my mystique…you know a certain je ne sais quoi….heavy emphasis on the quoi hahaha. Hey man, don’t hate on my specialness!
But these days my emotions have been on a grand EMO roller coaster. I don’t know if it has anything to do with me getting older and my hormones are out of wack? But I gather not. Secretly, or not so secretly I have always been an emotional person. I take most things personal. And I will cry about it in a heartbeat. But there are some plus sides to being hella, stupid dumb EMO….yes, being overly emotional has benefits LOL… You always know where I stand, because I will always tell you. And usually because I’m so quick to release, I’m usually able to release and move on. But the downside still remains, I’m emotional, and can often look hella hella crazy from it. Once I get in my emotions. Good God and Good luck! Like really….God speed.
Now, when I get like this it can be a special time that can create many, many stories , because I don’t operate like this ALLLLL the time. Okay lies, the tears, well, they’re here to stay. That will never change. The “off balance part” well, that comes and goes as the spirit calls on it. Hahahaha. Now, when I get like this, you know all in my emotions…it can affect my sleep like nobody’s business. I can start tossing and turning, weird dreams, not sleep, the list goes on. And actually, the other night I had the craaaaaaziest dream. Like one of those that when you wake up, for like 15 minutes you think it happened? Ya, that’s how crazy of a dream I had. There were people…conversation…they were kind of in the apartment with me, but not really. A true mind fuck. But as I was trying to piece together the pieces, (you know how you do after a dream was extra, you’ll spend the next 5 minutes trying to put it all together-totes impossible, it never makes as much sense as you did while you’re sleep, when you’re awake) it made me remember this time when I was living in Tennessee, when I went….ummmm how can I say this…temporarily crazy? Ok like not committable...I mean no one came out sooooo *looks around*…..hahahahaha
Now bear with me because I swore I wasn’t going to tell this story…I mean at least not on a bloooooog…hahaha, but this one is a classic.
**First a little back story, I used to live and work in Tennessee, one of my many states, in a small town called Johnson City. Now, where I actually resided was in an even SMALLER town called Grey, Tn. Yeah, it was like a little country township.**
Anywho, one night I was sleep and in the middle of my sleep I heard a man under my bed (no that isn’t a typo). The man was like “yeeeeaaaaah” deep…like Barry White deep. I jumped up out of my bed , down the stairs, and out the front door. Yes, you read that right. I jumped out of the bed, ran down the stairs and right out the front door. I mean, shit, there was a man UNDER my bed, understand? No time to play…get your isht and run. I told y’all a while back I have cat like reflexes. I’ll never wait around to get slaughtered, you hear me?
So back to the story, I’m on the porch. And I’m like WHAT THEE HELL is he doing under my bed? Like was he waiting to rape me? And like” yeah”? Word? What does that even mean? So again, I’m on the porch, like what to do? I can go to my neighbors, but they don’t like black people so I don’t think that’s an option. (Okay, I’m not sure they didn’t like black people, but they all had confederate flags waving so either they were trying to signal the lost soldiers oooorrrrrr….yeah…see?) So going to my neighbors wasn’t an option. I had just gotten in from out of town, so my bag was downstairs, so I ran in quickly grabbed a robe and my cordless and back to the porch. And I’m pacing, I’m like I should call the police. But what will I say? There’s a man….under…..my….bed? Right, back to that…I was still confused how he got under there. When I ran out the door, I unlocked and unhooked the chain? Sooooo did he just materialize there?
Now I was out there for a while, maybe 15 minutes trying to make a decision. In the meantime, I ran back in, grabbed a butcher knife and back to the porch. Because hey, I….need…a…weapon…right? Now several minutes had passed, and I decided (you know with the flags blowing in the wind) I was probably safer inside than outside so I decided to go back in and look under said bed. And low and behold…need I say it? Yeah… no man. Kind of anti-climatic huh? LOL but here’s the kicker….I realized that the man I heard…you know “yeeeaaaaaaah”…the skinny Barry? Was me! I was snoring and talking in my sleep so loud and deep that it startled me out of my sleep hahahahahahahaha!
I know you’re wondering where I’m going with this story like a conclusion right? And the answer is….nowhere.
In the words of my dear friend, “sometimes there are no conclusions”. THE END.
Happy Throwback Thursday…..
BWAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA
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