SOME PEOPLE LIKE PINEAPPLE, SOME PEOPLE DON’T…

That Sam-I-am
That Sam-I-am!
I do not like
that Sam-I-am

Do you like
green eggs and ham

I do not like them,
Sam-I-am.
I do not like
green eggs and ham **Dr. Seuss “Green Eggs and Ham”

I was perusing facebook the other day. Yes perusing it. You know how it is.  Just kind of rolling through there to see what everyone was talking about, and I ran across this post from a college friend where he mentioned one of his girlfriends made a comment regarding her approach to men not being interested in her.   And it was a cute little statement about the men being ill decision makers and therefore she wouldn’t be interested in them anyway.  I loved it because sometimes you just have to tell yourself whatever you need to move on right?  And if that’s “it’s not me but aaaaaall them” so be it. You know as long as you stay grounded in reality. LOL.  Don’t judge me, I will totally make you a liar, a con-artist, and a polygamist with 5 kids in varying states in order to get you out of my system annnnd it will all be true…in my head *sips tea* 

Let’s face it; rejection is a bitch, a big fat bitch, with a nasty ass attitude.  Hmmph, there’s no other way to put it.  Shoot, sometimes it’s hard to wrap your head around the fact that someone isn’t interested in you.  It can be hella hurtful if you allow yourself to internalize it.  But the reality is it happens, right?  Not everyone is going to like you or want to be with you and to like someone who doesn’t necessarily like you back in that way can sting…deep.  BUT sometimes it’s just not personal.  You like what you like, and he/she like what they like, it just doesn’t go any deeper than that.  Trust me, I’ve been there. You can be the cutest thing ever…personality for days….there’s no rhyme or reason; It just comes down to preference. 

One time years ago, my friend’s little sister was trying to “hook me” up with her mentor. She thought we would be compatible, so on her sister’s birthday she thought it would be a good time to plan “a blind meet up” of sorts.  I was uber nervous not for the date but to meet this guy.  I have long believed that I’m the type of girl who’s personality is what draws men in and not necessarily my looks.   Not that I’m unattractive (hahahaha) because that sounds so like an “a face for radio” type of statement but I truly believe I’m just not the girl you see in a crowded room and think you haaaave to get with me.  Of course as I type this one of my friends are going to say “that’s not true blah blah blah” LOL. I know my girls well, love them, but it IS true.  When I say this, I don’t say it as a self-depreciating thing, it’s just the hard core facts based on 20 plus years of dating,  meeting folks and experimenting.  Let’s just say I know my optimal environment and I'm honest about it.  So with that said, because I know that my “draw” is a personality thing, I’m not really a fan of blind dates.  I prefer for the person to get to know me first and then meet me. Therefore, you’ll be more appreciative of the complete package (personality and looks).

So obvs, the closer we got to the day I was supposed to meet him, I was feeling very apprehensive and just uneasy about it.  I reached out to a few friends and shared with them why I was nervous because really at the end nobody likes rejection and I was in a space in my life at that time where I just didn’t think I could handle it.  So I emailed two of my friends just for them to talk me off the ledge. 

**Side bar: Listen, I’ve said this before but if I haven’t called you or text you or hell emailed you with a “listen to this…” “Soo…right…I have this situation” <<We. Are. Not. Friends. LOL  If we are friends and you've yet to receive this call, don't you fret, it's coming soon...TRUST**

Now knowing where I was going with my anxiety my friend offered me this advice (I cannot believe I still have this email)

“Some people really like pineapple some don't.  In the end, there's nothing different about the pineapple.  It's just folk’s preferences around it.  Whether a guy is interested in us (or we in him) is all about preferences.  Me personally, I like a chocolate brother with a big build, beautiful smile, pretty teeth // other people may like him thin framed, caramel complexion. . . At the end of the day, there's nothing wrong with either man.  Just my preference.  Remember that…”

Is this not the best statement ever??  Some people like pineapple, some people really don’t.  Just because someone doesn't like it, doesn't make it a less sweet and succulent fruit, it just means this ONE person just doesn’t like it. Somewhere else pineapple is someone’s favorite fruit. 

Now I wish I can tell you I met this guy, he loved me and we lived happily ever after.  Actually, I didn’t...we didn't. We ended up not even meeting.  Hahahaha! How is that for putting your shoes on before your pants!(is that how that saying goes? )  There was something about a car accident, or a  non working car, I don’t really remember LOL what I do remember is I never met him and I'm not with him now and that's all that counts rigggggggggggght? But I digress.  Every so often I may feel like, “why isn’t so and so not into me like I want him to be?” or even when I encounter a rejection situation (because it happens) I always remember this statement.  “Some people like pineapple, some people don’t”.   Yeah it’s not hella deep or philosophical, but it’s simple and true.  And instead of me demonizing him and making him  the scum of the earth in my head (oh yes that IS still the other viable option lol), I can just simply settle with the fact that he’s not into me, and that’s okay he has a right to not be…I mean shit I don’t like beets right?